B978 <=> B980 (BTG XLII Beelzebub in America, p. 979)

“In general he always drank more than enough of the ‘alcoholic liquids’ existing there; and when we happened to be together in Paris in the restaurants on Montmartre where it was obligatory to order champagne which I neither liked nor drank, he would always drink it all alone with great pleasure.

“Besides always drinking, he was also, as is said there, a great ‘petticoat chaser.’

“The moment he saw what they call there the ‘pretty face’ of a being of the female sex, his whole body and even his breathing suddenly changed.

“When I noticed that he was this time more intoxicated than usual and when, having sat down beside me, he ordered coffee with what is called there an ‘aperitif,’ I asked him:

“’Explain to me, please, my young friend, why do you always drink this “poison?”’

“To this question of mine he answered:

“’Ekh! My dear Doctor! I drink this “poison,” in the first place, because I am so accustomed to it that I cannot now stop drinking without suffering, and secondly I drink it because only thanks to the effect of the alcohol can I calmly look on at the obscenity which goes on here,’ he added, waiving his hand around.

“’I began drinking this, as you called it, poison because the accidental and for me unlucky and wretched circumstances of my life were so arranged that I had to come and live a long time in this maleficent Europe.

“’I first began to drink because everybody here whom I met also drank, and, unless you drink, you are called a “woman,” a “girl,” “dolly,” “dearie,” “sissy,” “ninny,” and similar derisive names. Not wishing my business acquaintances to call me by these offensive names I also began to drink.

“’And in addition, thanks also to the fact that when I first came over to Europe, conditions of life here in respect of morality and patriarchality were entirely in contrast with those conditions in which I was born and brought up, I, seeing and perceiving all this, used to experience a painful feeling of shame and an unaccountable embarrassment. At the same time I noticed that from the effect of the alcohol I drank, not only was the depression I experienced alleviated, but I could look upon it all quite calmly, and even have the wish to participate in this abnormal life, so contradictory of my nature and my established views.