Soon after the definite inculcation into my nature of the said new inherency, that is the unaccountable striving to elucidate the real reasons for the arising of all sorts of “actual facts”, on my first arrival in the heart of RUSSIA, the city of Moscow, where, finding nothing else for the satisfaction of my psychic needs, I occupied myself with the investigation of RUSSIAn legends and sayings, I once happened — whether accidentally or as a result of some objective sequence according to law I do not know — to learn by the way the following: 161 BTG I

Once upon a time a certain RUSSIAn, who in external appearance was to those around him a simple merchant, had to go from his provincial town on some business or other to this second capital of RUSSIA, the city of Moscow, and his son, his favorite one — because he resembled only his mother — asked him to bring back a certain book. 162 BTG I

“And I first began thinking about it when I learned that the power-possessing beings also of that no less great contemporary community were already utilizing that maleficent means of theirs, sport, for their own Hasnamussian aims, exactly as the power-possessing beings of the community RUSSIA had, for their similar aims, utilized what is called ‘the-question-of-RUSSIAn-vodka’. 2571 BTG XXIX

“Just as the power-possessing beings of the community RUSSIA then tried, by every kind of artifice, to instill into the weak wills of the ordinary beings the necessity of the intensive use of the said ‘RUSSIAn vodka’, so also the power-possessing beings of that community England are now already also maneuvering to intrigue the ordinary beings of their community with this same sport and to urge them to it by every means. 2572 BTG XXIX

“Just as in the large community RUSSIA the contents of all what are called ‘newspapers’ and ‘magazines’ used to be always devoted to the question of RUSSIAn vodka, so now in that community England, more than half of the text of all their ‘evil-sowers’ is devoted to that famous sport”. 2575 BTG XXIX

“For instance, the beings of the contemporary community called RUSSIA, however hard they try cannot pronounce these said two letters at all, yet, nevertheless, they very definitely sense their difference, and whenever they have to use these letters in words with definite notions, then although the letters they pronounce do not correspond at all, yet they correctly sense their difference and do not use one letter for the other. 2815 BTG XXX

“This, my present tale, refers to that period when I had already often begun to frequent that large community which was called RUSSIA. 3038 BTG XXXI

“And so . . . when I used to go to that second chief place of RUSSIA, where that acquaintance of mine, the pharmacist, existed, I would always call on him and there m the back room of his pharmacy, which as a rule they call a ‘laboratory’, I used to chat with him about every kind of ‘fiddle-faddle’. 3043 BTG XXXI

“And he further explained as follows: “‘This Dover’s powder is, I don’t know why, a very popular remedy among us in RUSSIA, and it is used by almost all the peoples of our enormous empire. 3049 BTG XXXI

“‘Many hundreds of thousands of packets of powder are used here daily all over the country and the opium this powder ought to contain is, as you know, no cheap thing and if real opium were put into this powder, the opium alone would cost us pharmacists six or eight kopecks a packet, and we have to sell this powder for three to five kopecks. Besides, even if all the opium from the whole of the globe were collected the position would be the same, there would not be enough for our RUSSIA alone. 3050 BTG XXXI

“I was first in the town of that part of Turkestan which later came to be called ‘Chinese Turkestan’ in contradistinction to that part of it which, from the time of its conquest by beings belonging to the large community RUSSIA, has been called ‘RUSSIAn Turkestan’. 3284 BTG XXXIII

XXXIV RUSSIA 3331 BTG XXXIV

“‘Would you consent to go to my country, to RUSSIA and, after you have seen everything on the spot that is going on there, help us to organize this Trusteeship of ours, in such a way that it may indeed become of that use to my country for which it was founded?’ 3348 BTG XXXIV

“When this sympathetic elderly RUSSIAn finished speaking, I, having thought a little, replied that I might very possibly consent to his proposal to go to RUSSIA, since that country might perhaps be very suitable also for my chief aim. 3350 BTG XXXIV

“Further I said to him: ‘At the present time I have but one aim, namely, specifically to clear up for myself all the details of the manifestations of the human psyche of individuals existing separately as well as in groups. Well now, for the elucidation of the state and manifestations of the psyche of large groups, RUSSIA would perhaps be very suitable for me, since as I have understood during our talks the disease of the “passion for alcohol” is spread there in your country among almost the entire population, thanks to which I shall the more often have the possibility of carrying out my experiments on various types, each separately as well as in a mass’. 3351 BTG XXXIV

“‘The best representatives of these “turkeys” are the contemporary people of RUSSIA and it was by these turkeys, namely, that one of the chief crows of this country was surrounded who not long ago rapidly passed by us. 3378 BTG XXXIV

“But enough about this. Listen further now to the events in which I happened to take part after my arrival in the chief place of existence of the community RUSSIA, then called Saint Petersburg. 3389 BTG XXXIV

“Now, my boy, if you will strive to assimilate well the information about the subsequent events which happened to me and which were the results of this famous presentation of mine to His Majesty the Emperor, then you will probably acquire the possibility of clearly picturing to yourself and well understand how, there among your favorites, particularly in this large community RUSSIA at that period, their what is called ‘individual significance’, particularly in recent centuries, began to be appraised and be built up for the majority of these unfortunates always exclusively on the basis of the outer ephemeral as they are called ‘Vietro-yretznel’, as, in the given case, it similarly took place in relation to me. 3478 BTG XXXIV

“After this unforgettable ‘supreme presentation’ of mine, I very soon left St. Petersburg for other parts of the continent of Europe and began to have as the chief places of my existence various cities of the countries which were situated both on that same continent Europe as well as on other continents. I was again later, many times, but for other affairs, in the same community RUSSIA, where during that period of the flow of time their great process there of reciprocal-destruction took place and the destruction of everything already attained by them, which this time, as I have already told you, was called by them ‘Bolshevism’. 3494 BTG XXXIV

“For your better representation and all-round understanding in what way customs and automatic habits useful for their ordinary existence acquired by them during centuries also disappear without a trace, or change for the worst on account of the mentioned property of their strange psyche, we will take as an example just these same terrestrial three-brained beings with their customs whom all other beings of your planet call ‘RUSSIAns’ and who represent the majority of that community named RUSSIA. 3595 BTG XXXIV

“And so, again in consequence of the fact that in the common presences of the three-brained beings of this planet Earth of yours who dwell on that part of the continent Asia which was called, and until now is called RUSSIA, ‘being-Partkdolg-duty’ also finally ceased to be actualized, on account of which this, for them, most maleficent property of their psyche, namely, ‘suggestibility’, began gradually to increase; and in consequence of the fact that they, thanks to changed circumstances which flowed from always the same terrifying process of periodic reciprocal destruction, existing only on that ill-starred planet, were deprived of the former influence and were compelled, not having the possibility of independent existence, to fall under new influences, they this time fell under the influence of beings of European communities, chiefly of the community which exists there under the name ‘France’. 3598 BTG XXXIV

“Since the beings of this community France began automatically to influence the psyche of the beings of the community RUSSIA, and these latter began even to strive to imitate the beings of this community France in everything, thus all the good customs among them which were already present in the process of their existence and those moral habits which had become inherent in them, either half-consciously or automatically taken by them from the beings of ancient Asiatic communities, were gradually forgotten, and new ones-French-acquired. 3599 BTG XXXIV

“Among the customs and automatic moral habits useful for the beings of the community RUSSIA, transmitted to them from the beings of old Asiatic communities, there were thousands of indeed very good ones. 3600 BTG XXXIV

“Well, it is this need of going periodically to such hammams which had already become inherent in the beings of the continent Asia, and which later passed also to the beings of this community RUSSIA. 3619 BTG XXXIV

“Now as regards the second of the good customs taken as an example by us, the fulfilling of which two centuries ago was still organically needed by every being of this community RUSSIA, namely, the custom of chewing keva after the use of the first being-food, this custom already no longer exists there at all now among contemporary RUSSIAns. 3632 BTG XXXIV

“It must be remarked that at the present time the custom of chewing keva without meanwhile understanding its purport, began to implant itself while I was still there among the beings dwelling on the continent called ‘America’, where the use of such keva, or as they have already called it, by another name, ‘chewing gum’, is very widely spread and even takes on the dimensions of a great manufacturing branch of commerce there. Meanwhile it is interesting to notice that the fundamental part of this American chewing gum is exported just from RUSSIA, namely, from the locality called ‘Caucasia’. The beings dwelling in this locality do not even know why these ‘mad’ Americans import this unnecessary root good for nothing and for nobody. 3633 BTG XXXIV

“Of course to no one of them does the thought even enter his head that these Americans importing this ‘good-for-nothing’ root are indeed, though in a subjective sense, ‘mad’, yet in an objective sense they are merely, as they themselves express it, ‘daylight robbers’ of the beings of this RUSSIA. 3634 BTG XXXIV

“In general, to follow the example of others or set an example to others is considered and cognized as fully reasonable and inevitably necessary everywhere in the Universe among all three-brained beings, and that the three-brained beings of this large community RUSSIA follow the example of the beings of the community France, this on their part is even very sensible. Why not take example from what is good? 3641 BTG XXXIV

“The form of external existence of all communities existing on this continent Europe is little distinguished from the external form of existence of the beings of that large community RUSSIA. 3647 BTG XXXIV

Further, Beelzebub continued to speak thus: “After Germany, I had for a short time the place of my existence again there on the continent Europe among the beings of the community called ‘Italy’; and after Italy, among the beings of that community, who became for the beings of the community RUSSIA what are called the ‘sources’ for the satisfaction of that ‘vice’ which long before had become fixed in the abnormal process of the ordinary being-existence of terrestrial three-brained beings of recent centuries, and which is called ‘suggestibility’; that is, I settled among the beings of the community France. 3679 BTG XXXVII

“The beings of the continent America had already there in Paris finally taken the place in recent times of the beings of the great community RUSSIA after the ‘death’ of this latter. 3702 BTG XXXVII

“It turned out that the beings there of that time, belonging to the caste of the ruling class of that dead RUSSIA were very fond of the ‘capital of the world’ and often went there; and almost every one of them, out of ‘swank’, gave himself out as a titled individual, such as ‘Count’, ‘Baron’, or ‘Prince’, but most frequently of all, as a ‘Grand Duke’. And, since all of them obligatorily paid ‘visits’ to dubious places of ‘foreign Paris’, the professional guides now call such a ‘tour’ the tournée du Grand Duc (which in English means ‘the Grand Duke’s tour’). 3724 BTG XXXVII

“In recent times in this Montmartre, very many what are called ‘special RUSSIAn restaurants’ had been opened, and both in these special RUSSIAn restaurants, as well as other restaurants, the so-called ‘artists’ and ‘actors’ are beings of just the great community RUSSIA, mostly from the beings of the former ruling class there. 3733 BTG XXXVII

“And so, my boy, although this same fashion, the cutting of the hair of the beings of the female sex, invented in this Paris itself by beings with Hasnamussian properties, was not then in the beginning implanted in this same community France, yet owing to their capital being the collecting place for the beings with Hasnamussian properties from other countries who continue to persist in this maleficent invention, these latter have ultimately succeeded in implanting it; and the beings of the female sex, there in France also, likewise have begun to cut their hair, and at the present time this cutting of their hair is in full swing for nearly all of them. At the hairdressers even, chiefly of course there in their capital Paris, they have to take their turn as I was informed in this etherogram, exactly as people had to take their turn not long ago in the community RUSSIA for receiving ‘American flour’. And from this contagious rush of women to the hairdressers to get their hair cut, court proceedings are already arising between these hairdressers and the fathers, husbands, and brothers of these ‘shorn lambs’, and many what are called ‘divorces’ are also obtained. 3852 BTG XXXVII

“While telling you about this separate grouping of the three-brained beings, that is about France, I must also tell you for the fullness of its characterization that in France there are also beings of the ruling class, who also invented very ‘good means’ for the calming of the minds of the ordinary beings of their community, just as the power-possessing beings of the big community RUSSIA employ such a means for the encouragement of the use of the famous RUSSIAn vodka, and the power-possessing beings of the community England at the present time attain the same by their not less famous ‘sport’. 3858 BTG XXXVII

“However, it must be admitted that although the power-possessing beings of the community France also adopt these ‘good means’ and successfully attain their egoistic aims, yet these means, though, be it said, to no credit of the power-possessing beings of the communities of England and RUSSIA, bring scarcely any harm to the planetary bodies themselves of the ordinary beings. 3859 BTG XXXVII

“Thanks to these innovations, there is no doubt but that exactly the same will be repeated with the beings of this Turkey as occurred to the beings of the large community RUSSIA after they had also begun to imitate everything European. 3960 BTG XXXVIII

“It may be noted, for example, that, indeed, in all the beings of that large community RUSSIA, only one or two centuries ago, before they had yet begun to imitate everything European, these two being-functions still obtained which are called ‘Martaadamlik’ and ‘Nammuslik’, or — as these being-feelings are still called – the ‘feeling-of-religiousness’ and the ‘feeling-of-patriarchality’. 3961 BTG XXXVIII

“In RUSSIA, moreover, none of this began with the yashmak or the fez. 3964 BTG XXXVIII

“Of course, the psyche of these Turkish beings will also soon degenerate as it degenerated in the beings of the community of RUSSIA. 3969 BTG XXXVIII

“In short, my boy, the same is being repeated on this continent America as also took place quite recently in the large community called RUSSIA. There the power-possessing responsible beings also prohibited the consumption of the famous ‘RUSSIAn vodka’ with the consequence that these beings very soon adapted themselves to consume, instead of this ‘vodka’, the no less famous ‘Hanja’, from the effects of which thousands of these unfortunate beings are still dying there daily. 5646 BTG XLII

“But in the present case, we must certainly give the contemporary American beings their due. In their skill at concealing their consumption of this famous alcohol from the authorities, they are infinitely more ‘civilized’ than the beings of the community RUSSIA. 5647 BTG XLII

“But in the northern part, especially in the locality called ‘Azerbaijan’, which comes into direct contact with the large half-European, half-Asiatic community called RUSSIA, the percentage of beings infected with this disease increases more and more in proportion to their proximity to this RUSSIA. 5906 BTG XLII

“It can thus be said that the chief disseminators of this disease among the beings of the continent Asia are, from the northwestern side, the beings of the large group RUSSIA, and from the eastern side, the beings of the community England. 5908 BTG XLII

“‘At first, as I have already told you, I went to RUSSIA, then I went to Germany, Italy, and to other European countries, and now, finally, I have lived here in France already seven years. 5971 BTG XLII

“‘You will clearly understand how these contemporary RUSSIAn Orthodox Christians fast, if I repeat to you the exact words of one of these genuine RUSSIAn Orthodox Christians, spoken to me not long ago there in RUSSIA. 6118 BTG XLII

“Here, my boy, you might as well know that certain of the beings who compose this large group, RUSSIA, are called by the rest Old Believers. 6121 BTG XLII

“‘”To tell the truth, here in RUSSIA we almost always eat the same things during the ‘meat’ periods. 6126 BTG XLII

“Although this occurrence took place in the large community of RUSSIA, yet nevertheless this ‘story’ which I shall now tell you is very characteristic and gives a very good picture in general of the education of the children of their contemporary civilization. 6245 BTG XLII

“It is characteristic because in this large community RUSSIA also, the contemporary responsible beings, especially the beings of what is called the upper ‘ruling class’, educate their children exactly as the contemporary responsible beings of the other communities breeding on the continents of Europe and America educate theirs. 6246 BTG XLII

“I noticed in the cities Petrograd and Tiflis situated in the large community RUSSIA, of which community more beings perished than of any other during that World War of theirs, that that kind of quadruped being which as a rule never appeared there, namely, the quadruped beings which hate people and which are called ‘wolves’, were already prowling in the streets. 6727 BTG XLIII

“In the information communicated to me by etherogram it was said, among other things, that in the same large community RUSSIA the birth rate of beings of the kinds of rodents called ‘mice’ and ‘rats’ had increased to such an unprecedented extent that at the present time they are beginning to devour most of the stored provisions of the beings of the said community. 6728 BTG XLIII

“It was further conveyed in the same etherogram that the power-possessing beings of the community RUSSIA had applied to the beings of another European community to undertake the destruction of the existence of those small beings — mice and rats — which had multiplied among them, in return for which they promised to pay them as much money as it would cost. 6729 BTG XLIII

“Though a temporary reduction of the numbers of these poor rats and mice may be obtained by the various means at the disposal of those specialists in the destruction of the existences of others, yet the beings of the other communities will possibly not quite consent to do this ‘gratis’. To pay in money, however, this the beings of that RUSSIA who promised it will, of course, not be able to do, since it might cost them in money much more than their last war. 6730 BTG XLIII